A life of IFs living in a world of certainty

Trying to get Disability Benefits  Ughhhhh!!!!

Does anyone else feel like they are living a life of what ifs in a world of certainty? What if I have a relapse? IF I  have a relapse then what? I know I don't look disabled but IF I have a relapse then I can't... walk, talk, bathe or feed myself or use my hands period... Not approved for disability?... IF I relapse though I can't work at all. IF I relapse I can't go out alone.I can't wear heels. (lol) IF i relapse I can't exercise! IF I relapse... I can't be 18,19, or 40! Ugghhhh I hate this life of IFs but the world says okay... that's IF you have a relapse. You look fine to me. Are you having one right now? No? Okay well we can't go off an IF. IF you stress too much. IF you get too tired. IF you can't do things for yourself. Well you can right now right? Yeah... we can't help IFs. Do you sometimes feel like your first name is IF and your last name is MS? The world often says well sorry Mr. / Mrs. MS we can't help you... Don't get discouraged. 

Disability  UGGGHHHHH!!!!

How many of us MS warriors can understand the frustration of trying to get disability benefits??? Doesn't t it just make you want to scream!!! Sure we look fine or in most of our cases "fabulous" but have one bad day, the smallest amount of stress and it's hello MRIs, solumedrol, wheelchair and physical therapy, sometimes even more than physical therapy, here we come(!!), for months or even years at a time; sometimes resulting in permanent disability.
I know I've wondered myself, "can I just catch a break and get approved so I can take it easy? So I don't end up having that one relapse that leaves me totally handicapped. Is this really too much to ask?..." Well guys, to them it is too much to ask simply because so many people abuse the system. Though we know that we may look fine one day and could possibly wake up and not be able to do anything for ourselves the next.  The people who work for the disability office do not understand and couldn't care less... All hope is not loss. If you are trying to get disability benefits never give up!! Know the difference between SSI (Supplemental Security Income) and SSD (Social Security Disability) you will probably be applying for both. Be sure to keep documentation of every single thing that happens to you. If you go to primed for a cold... It's because of your MS. You stump your toe and sprang it? it's your MS. Your fatigue is unbearable?  Of course it's because of your MS. Document EVERYTHING. Have your doctors document everything! When fighting this fight, documentation is everything. And most of all do not work. -at all- I know everyone has bills but if you can save up before applying while you can still work, that would be a good idea. (I would suggest saving enough to take care of yourself for at lease a year or two and knowing when a year or two before you are unable to work is hard to gauge but I think people should always save in general. You never know what life has up her sleeve.) The process is long , hard and frustrating and you have to be prepared for it if you can. keep track of your money too; from the time you apply forward. I mean really keep track, write it down. Do whatever you have to do to keep track of your money. SSI is usually temporary but they will want to know where every single penny went during your process. They want to know how you paid all your bills and which pennies paid them. (lol) I know memory is an issue for a lot of us... They don't care about that either. The interviewers are very heartless (which I guess they have to be) and they will MAKE you give them an answer. Most of all (over the last most of all lol) don't let them stress you too much as we all know, stress worsens symptoms. From my own experience: When I finished my interview, I had more noticeable tingling, numbness and Spasticity. But gues what? They couldn't see that either and wouldn't have care anyway. (lol). Well I really hope this helps someone.  Don't give up!!!!

:::I am not a social security worker or professional. I'm just sharing my experiences hoping to help other through them. If you are a professional or have some advice yourself, please comment below:::

ALSO: Check your local hospital for nonprofit organizations who assist with helping patients get disability and financial assistance with bills
-Don't be ashamed or too prideful to tell people that your struggling; you never know who God put in your path to bless you. :)

Keep S’myelin and stay Fabulous!